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Andrew Evans | The Worst Films of 2014

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If there could be anything said about the role of cinema in 2014, it would be, "bleh." It was a year filled with shoddy remakes and boring sequels. The brilliant Marvel and the arrogant Michael Bay dominated the box office, and Indies were few in numbers. It's safe to say that 2014 was just a rest stop for the upcoming explosion of superhero films and mega-franchises.

Before we remember the horrible, here are some honorable mentions:

 

Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones was more forgettable than bad. Banking off of the franchise with a brilliant first installment and gradually worse sequels, The Marked Ones could have been the film that brought identity to the Paranormal series. Instead, the film tried really hard to act like a horror version of Max Landis' Chronicle.

 

 

Some fantasy novels are meant for the big screen. Others are meant to stay novels. One such film is Winter's Tale. This film fought itself from beginning to end. The cast was great and the set design was beautiful, but the story was mind-numbing. With a confusing reincarnation story set in two different eras and poor direction, Winter's Tale is a perfect example of how not to adapt a novel.

 

 

It seems hard to create comedies nowadays. Just look at Sex Tape and Let's Be Cops. They both had two likeable characters running around acting like they've never solved a problem in their life. Both films had two insane concepts that seem to be fit for high quality pornographic films rather than Hollywood cinema. Neither of these films were amusing. Fortunately, they were both forgettable, but not the worse this year.

 

Here are the worst films of 2014. 

 

10. The Amazing Spider-Man 2

 

 

The era of superhero films has come, but Sony still can't seem to get it right. This film was disappointing to say the least. The Amazing Spider-Man 2 was proof on how not to put the pieces together for a cinematic universe. The film suffered the problems that Spider-Man 3 suffered from. There were pacing issues, a huge overload of characters, and structural problems. You'd think they would've learned? The Amazing Spider-Man 2 was an effort in building up a cinematic universe for Sony, but was an unmemorable one.

Grade: C

 

9.  A Million Ways To Die In The West

 

 

Seth McFarlane has made a career with pop culture and trying to be funny. A Million Ways To Die In The West might be the pinnacle of his stupid jokes and nonsense storytelling. This should have been a throwback to Mel Brooks' Blazing Saddles and John Ford films. Instead, audiences got a film that unsuccessfully fed off the popularity and ego of its creator.

Grade: D

 

8.  300: Rise of an Empire

 

 

Hollywood can make a sequel out of anything these days. 300: Rise of an Empire takes place before, during, and after the events of the original 300. While 300 presented cinema with a new style of film-making brought about by auteur director Zack Snyder, Rise of an Empire doesn't do much to further that style. All the colors and sets blend together to create one big blur. The actors take their roles as seriously as they'd take a fast-food position. Then there's the over-the-top and out-of-left-field sex scene between Sullivan Stapleton and Eva Green. When will Hollywood learn that some films are better left alone?

Read my review here.

Grade: F

 

7.  Tammy

 

 

Tammy could have been a statement on Melissa McCarthy's fearlessness about her weight, but the film was so classless that the story became all about McCarthy's weight and nothing else. McCarthy looks genuinely sad in every scene. Co-star Susan Sarandon suffers through yelling fat jokes at McCarthy. At the end of the film you can only hope that McCarthy wasn't suicidal during production.

Read my review here.

Grade: D

 

6.  I, Frankenstein

 

 

Films that bank off another film's style usually don't fair well at the box office. Films that bank off another film's style, and that style being nearly ten years old, fair worse. I, Frankenstein's style is 100% similar to the visual beauty of Underworld. It's a film filled with dark blues and bright oranges, while the characters are pale and thin. What seems to start as a simple adaptation of a classic monster novel, soon turns into cheap action scenes, poor character development and a boring climax.

Read my review here.

Grade: F

 

5.  The Legend of Hercules

 

 

A film that impresses at failing. How has Hollywood come so far, yet can't make a decent live-action Hercules film? If it's spectacle you're looking for, look somewhere else. The Legend of Hercules looks more like the Asylum Films version of Gladiator. Each moment in the film where it looks like there should be an epic scene, it turns out to be actors up against a green screen. Some people need a paycheck. The cast and crew probably took on this film to get some quick money in their pocket, and it shows in the flat acting and amateur directing.

Read my review here.

Grade: F

 

4.  Ouija

 

 

It seems that adaptations of famous board-games have just begun. It's unfortunate when the board-game isn't as famous as you might think, or when the game has no story to it. Funny enough, this is the third time Ouija has been turned into a film. Still no success, huh? The film is as wooden as the game. Michael Bay's, Platinum Dunes doesn't do much to help further the prestige of cinema. Horrible acting drowns the story, while the one element to make a horror film -- the horror -- is missing completely.

Grade: F

 

3. Dumb and Dumber To

 

 

Dumb and Dumber To is by far one of the most confusing sequels in Hollywood history. Why was this film made? After looking at the current down slide that the Farrelly Brothers are on, it would make sense that they would go back to the film that started their success. However, the humor is too low brow and the story is that made up by a kindergartner. I thought the title explained the main characters' personalities, not the film itself.

Read my review here.

Grade: D

 

2.  Transformers: Age of Extinction

 

 

I am a man that never gives up hope. If the world was in flames, I would have hope until the very end. That hope lead me to believe that the next installment in the Transformers franchise would be better than the previous installments. I no longer have hope for the Autobots.

 

The second Michael Bay film on this list was an inch close from being the worst film of 2014. Everything about this film had problems. B-movies from the 1960's had better dialogue. There was little care and creativity put into creating the Dinobots. The visual effects were terrible. Tons of subplots piled up onto each other, causing an overload of confusion and stretching what could have been an hour and a half film into a nearly three hour long bore-fest.

Read my review here.

Grade: F

 

1.  Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

 

 

Another Michael Bay film. I still stand by my original review of how horrible this film was. I still argue that the creators should be tried for crimes against humanity. This was the bare minimum of a film in any sense. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was poorly written and horrifically acted. The film didn't know if it should focus on the turtles or April O'Neill. The turtles had little character development and even less chemistry with one another. The creators decided to take the plot of Batman Begins and the ending of The Amazing Spider-Man, while mixing some Transformers-esque action sequences to create the worst film of 2014.

Read my review here.

Grade: F

 

Rotten Tomatoes Scores:

 

The Amazing Spider-Man 2: 53%

A Million Ways To Die In The West: 33%

300: Rise of an Empire: 42%

Tammy: 24%

I, Frankenstein: 3%

Legend of Hercules: 3%

Ouija: 7%

Dumb and Dumber To: 28%

Transformers: Age of Extinction: 18%

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: 22%

 

You can read this article and more at Critic and the Fan.

 

 

 

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